Things that Hurricane Sandy could potentially ruin:
1. Our church’s Harvest Party, AKA The Funnest Night Of The Year.
2. The arrival of my birthday boots–scheduled to be delivered to my house on Wednesday, AKA The Day The Storm Of Death Is Supposed To Destroy Everything Which Probably Includes My Front Porch Onto Which My Birthday Boots Would Be Placed By The UPS Man.
3. Trick-or-Treating, AKA The Only Thing I Can Currently Hang Over My Son’s Head To Make Him Behave.
I hate you, Sandy. You are dumb. Take your drama somewhere else.