How my mind works

etc., work — Valerie on February 27, 2008 at 9:38 pm

I was doing some research at work today and I ended up sending an email around to my coworkers asking them what blogs they read. (Yes, it was part of the research. My job is better than yours.)

Someone sent me this link: http://toprankblog.com.

I read it as To Prank Blog and immediately thought “OMG, this is gonna be AWESOME.”

Yeah. That’s actually Top Rank Blog. As in marketing. Which is much more related to what we do than a blog devoted to playing tricks on people.

Nerd euphoria. Let me show you it.

work, favorite things — Valerie on January 21, 2008 at 8:43 pm

Meet my new officemate:

goodies.jpg

I started gleefully flagging pages right after I peeled myself off of the ceiling.

And I didn’t even pass out!

shout out, etc., work — Valerie on December 27, 2007 at 7:36 pm

I gave blood today, in honor of SalesBlood 2007. Here’s photographic evidence that I didn’t keel over and die whilst doing it:

salesblood1.jpg

(This picture was taken by TheBossMan in the middle of my donation. Look how happy I am!)

TheBossMan thought up SalesBlood two years ago and our company promotes it every year. If you’re into saving lives, you should think about donating, too.

I mean, come on. If a 113 pound, borderline-anemic can do it without so much as a dizzy spell, you can do it, too.

My face hurts.

etc., work — Valerie on December 18, 2007 at 7:59 pm

My work day consisted of so much laughing it was absolutely ridiculous - the kind where you try to stop but can’t and you just need to cover your face until it dies down. Then as soon as you make eye contact with someone, it’s starts all over again.

What a good day.

a love of mine

work, favorite things — Valerie on October 24, 2007 at 6:11 pm

Part of my job is to write the copy for the 404 pages on the sites we create. I seriously love doing this. It’s a chance to help the user figure out where he/she needs to go, and you can sometimes be a little clever. Check out the list below to see some of my favorite 404 pages (and, yes, I have them).

Imdb

Fussy

RVA Blogs (and it’s not just because I’m sleeping with the guy in charge.)

Apple

Penny-Arcade

Volkswagen

Blurbomat (the lesser-known blog of Dooce’s husband)

Ok, that’s enough nerding out for now. And be sure to check out our resident 404 before you go…don’t think I haven’t looked at yours.

i’m hilarious

funny, work — Valerie on September 26, 2007 at 6:12 pm

One of my responsibilities at work (one of my favorite ones, actually) is to help write profiles on the people to whom we attribute the quotes we run in our newsletters and what not. The next person on my list for today was Robert Yates. When I Googled his name, three options came up. And then the following conversation took place…

Me: Are we profiling Robert Yates the Anti-Federalist, Robert Yates the NASCAR guy, or Robert Yates the serial killer?

Co-worker: It’s the NASCAR guy - probably not as interesting as the serial killer but much more appropriate, morally speaking.

Me: Fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine.

post and you shall receive

etc., work — Valerie on September 19, 2007 at 12:22 am

After this post, my boss got me this book. Please note that I didn’t ask for it - it was suggested and this suggestion was simply taken.

So…

If one of you could suggest that a baby chimpanzee and Johnny Depp’s cell phone number are essential to creativity, I’d really appreciate it.

remedies for writer’s block

work — Valerie on September 15, 2007 at 3:30 pm

For someone who is expected to be creative upon command, writer’s block is about the worse thing that can come along. Few things are more paralyzing than a blank screen that you know must be filled because other people (and large amounts of money) are depending on it.

I’ve read a lot of posts on copywriting blogs about this exact issues lately, most likely because I’ve been dealing with a wicked case of writer’s block myself, due to not feeling well, ridiculous exhaustion, and a relentless schedule of a million things to get done every day.

These posts got me thinking about what I naturally do when I’m stuck. A lot of them are pretty funny.

For example, the first thing I do is go to the bathroom. Seriously. It’s like I’m expecting to find the elusive idea somewhere near the commode. And strangely enough, it usually works. I don’t feel at all weird about this because I know for a fact that Ross does the same thing.

If the bathroom doesn’t have the answer, I also try opening a blank Word document and typing whatever comes out. It usually looks something like this:

So we have these tshirts and they’re really great and they’re made of cotton and who doesn’t like cotton because I mean cotton is great and hmm let’s see what else yes tshirts are better than other shirts why should people buy this tshirt perhaps because they’re awesome…

And so on and so forth. The most important thing when using this method is not to delete anything you write. You’ll be surprised what can come out of it.

My last resort is perhaps the most ridiculous: I pluck my eyebrows. My eyebrows occupy much of mind and are usually the go-to part of my face that gets messed with when I’m stressed out (don’t you mess with your face?) So, if I eliminate the stray hairs to pick at, I’m left to just face the task at hand.

As I was thinking about all of this I came across one blog pointing out that Wordsworth used to take 20 mile walks and Einstein took naps in the middle of the afternoon to get their ideas flowing. While my boss is extremely understanding, I doubt he’ll be ok with me curling up on the couch and saying, “I’m just not feeling creative right now. Please excuse me for a couple hours.”

And with that, it’s back to work for me. Yes, I’m trying to get some work done on a Saturday. I was out for half a day on Thursday and I don’t want to get behind. Oh, and apparently one of the ways I deal with writer’s block is to post to my blog.

a conversation from today

work — Valerie on August 21, 2007 at 6:19 pm

The following took place after me mentioning a new benefit announced at my work today…

Ross: Do you work in God’s throne room?

Me: Apparently

Ross: Dag.

on the issue of office chairs

BAH, work — Valerie on July 19, 2007 at 5:45 pm

First, let me start by saying that I am incredibly grateful that this is the only (seriously, the one and only) complaint I have about my new job.

With that, allow me to share some numbers with you. The seat of an office chair is typically about 20 inches deep (believe me, I’ve researched this). Meanwhile, the distance from my rear end and where my knee bends is approximately 14 inches. If I sit with my back resting completely against the chair, the my knees cannot bend and my feet don’t touch the floor. If I rest my feet on the floor, I have almost 1/2 a foot between my body and the back of my chair. So, throughout the day I must choose to either have numb legs or a crippled back. Something tells me that the chair won’t be shrinking anytime soon, so I need to figure something out.

Any suggestions?

*UPDATE*

Upon reading this, my boss came to me and insisted that I figure out which chair was most comfortable for me.  I had a new chair in about an hour.  The power of the Internets, friends.

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